Short insight - Where not to eat in Nyeri when hungry:

I had half an hour to spare as my vehicle was being serviced at a garage in a local petrol station, so I popped into a nearby hotel as I browsed my newspaper for some lunch. This hotel is one of the oldest in Nyeri and has an excellent location in a commercial/business area so the expectation is that it should always have a sizeable crowd in the restaurant. But today I was alone and this should have alerted me that something was amiss.

So I take my seat and ask for the special of the day that was advertised on the board at the entrance to the hotel. It’s my favorite pork and chips and I figure that being the special of the day it should take very little time to prepare and I should be in and out in 20 minutes tops. As I wait I ask for a soft drink which I sip on in anticipation of a sumptuous meal soon.

After 10 minutes, a threesome arrives for lunch and takes their seats at a table and now we are four patrons. “Poor guys” I think to myself “do they know how long it will take to get served in this place?” It has now been 20 minutes after all and there is no sign of my meal and I am alone so surely for three people it shall take double or even triple the amount of time it shall take to get my meal to the table.

I continue reading my newspaper, the hunger pangs biting and I looking anxiously at my watch wondering what’s taking so long but secure in the knowledge that I shall be out of there before the threesome has even started on their meal. Finally I see the waitress who is serving me appear with a jug and a bowl to wash my hands – a uniquely Kenyan tradition even if the meal requires no use of the hands - and the hunger pangs now nip even more brutally. It has now been 30 minutes since I showed up!

I don’t believe what I am seeing though as she goes straight to the table of three not even acknowledging my presence and proceeds to wash their hands. “Perhaps” I think to myself “I am next!” but alas done with the threesome she troops off to wherever they go when hiding from customers and returns with the utensils to help the Johnnie-come-lately’s enjoy their meal. A few minutes later she comes out laden with three plates of food and proceeds to serve the threesome. It is now 40 minutes since I took my seat.

Now all pretensions of being a gentleman are gone and I hiss at her (why do we do that?) to come to my table and I can see that she is quite uncomfortable because she knows that I am hungry and possibly upset because of the length of time it has taken not to serve me and in addition a threesome who came after me has been served before me.

I tell her that I can’t wait any longer for my meal as I am busy and I need to pay for my soft drink expecting her to apologize and try to hurry up the order, but she is either clueless on to how to handle an angry customer or more likely has no training in managing the situation that she finds herself in at present. I promptly pay for my soft drink, walk to the garage, collect my vehicle and go to the office where I sit licking my wounds the hunger pangs still gnawing away but too upset to think of eating even as I write about this nasty experience.

That folks is my experience at the recently refurbished Central Hotel in Nyeri. The hotel has been recently taken over by a tenant – the second in the past year – and they still can’t seem to get it right! The outside sitting area on a sunny day is the perfect place to have a leisurely meal as you catch up on the news but the atrocious service standards and lack of clientele seems to suggest a lackadaisical approach to customer service.

You’d expect that an upmarket restaurant in a town where upmarket restaurants are few and far between would be falling over itself to attract the local business and office crowd but alas this is not the first time I am experiencing mediocre service at the place the first time being about two months ago when the management changed hands and they went around town distributing vouchers for free lunches to introduce the hotel to the masses! On that day the food took about 20 minutes to arrive and some of the accompaniments were cold and the presentation barely exciting to any of my nerve endings.

So you have been warned, avoid that place like the plague and if you know the guys managing the place tell them that they need to shape up on their service because hungry people don’t like to wait for their food for any length of time beyond 10 minutes. As for me they have lost my custom however little it was contributing to their bottom line.

I’m done with lunch today and shall have an early dinner at home instead but that experience has left a nasty taste in my mouth pun fully intended!!