Friday, 9 May 2014

My KBL moment

I have just finished reading a novel called KBL. Before you start wondering what our very own Kenya Breweries Ltd is doing in a novel, hear me out.

This is one of those spy thrillers that is based on an incident that happened in 2011 that changed the face of terrorism globally and the narrative is liberally sprinkled with various acronyms (some quite colorful) as used by various agencies and the army in the USA the main agencies behind the plan that was hatched to track down and kill one of the most hated people in the world responsible for thousands of deaths across the world for many years. In this case, KBL is an acronym for 'Kill Bin Laden'.

I live in an apartment complex and my KBL moments are coming thick and fast these days. When I moved into this complex of 12 apartments a few months ago one of the things that struck me was that there were only 4 parking slots available. On enquiry I was told that a majority of the tenants did not own their own vehicles so it was going to be OK. Little did I know however that we had some county and university bosses living in the complex who were picked up and dropped off every morning and evening by their official drivers who had to find somewhere to park while they waited for their charges in the morning. The resultant back and forth as they gave way for we regular tenants to leave in the morning as the bosses were being waited for must have caused SMEANG -'serious mental anguish' to those drivers.

A few months down the line and the chickens have come home to roost because we now have close to 9 tenants with thier own vehicles who come home every evening and must park somewhere meaning that someone was clearly ASOTJ or 'asleep on the job' when he was approving the building plans for the complex! As a result there has been a casualty in the compound because a bottle brush tree was shown the axe literally (pun intended) to try and create a way to accomodate some of the bulkier vehicles parked against one of the property walls and the poor tree was in the way!

How can an approval be given for residential units with inadequate parking arrangements surely? Was someone even thinking while they performed this VIAT -'very important assignment'? Mark you these are not cheap residential units by Nyeri standards but would be considered pricey units in an upmarket location meaning that those able to afford the rent would almost certainly be owning vehicles as well to boot so this fact should have informed the developer and the approver accordingly!!

Now we are forced to play a game of who gets home first so as to get the BPS -'best parking spot' and also try not to block too many people while at it. Clearly someone is responsible for this SNAFU - 'situation normal all fouled (fu%$ed) up!

Incidentally the novel KBL makes for great reading with a fast paced plot that gives some good insights on some of the public secrets on how the clandestine take down of UBL -'Usama Bin Laden' happened and while the author acknowledges that it is a work of fiction but based on actual events, the plot line is entirely believable and credible right up to UBL's body being incarcerated at sea.